Gift for Life

I have a weird fear of sinking in water while in a car – more specifically being on a long car ride at night, asleep, then waking up in mid-air as the car is flying off the road into a body of water. I have no idea where it comes from, but I’ve had it for a long time. While some may disagree on this next point, I don’t necessarily think of it as an irrational fear (who wouldn’t be afraid of that scenario), because it has never hindered me in any way. I still take car trips. I still fall asleep on said car trips. I don’t fear bridges or water. I do, however, own a LifeHammer.

The LifeHammer is a car escape tool designed to both cut through your seat belt and break your windows. Seems like the perfect device to help counteract my “irrational” fear, right? Well, there are a few flaws, in my mind, with the LifeHammer. First and foremost, I have never used it and don’t know if it actually works. It’s an expensive proposition to test it out on one’s car (and just rude to try it on someone else’s). Can it really shatter my windows? Can it really cut through my seat belt? — while we’re on the subject; does something happen once a car hits water that make it easier to cut yourself out of your seat belt than to simply press the button to release it? – It’s mechanical, not electrical, so that’s not it. Is it an adrenaline issue where your panicked brain is unable to process the simple button press and reverts to a primal state where the weapon-like blade makes more sense? – possibly. Anyway, I haven’t tried it.

Additionally, the testimonials found on lifehammer.com don’t exactly fill me with confidence:

“I am anxious to have your wonderful product. God Bless the young man who invented it. My son saw him demonstrating it at a trade show.”
~ Anonymous

“My daughter-in-law, Jo Ann, was quite pleased when she received your excellent product, the “LifeHammer”. Because I think this product is extremely important as a safety tool in an automobile, I also purchased a “LifeHammer” for myself and my other daughter-in-law, Dana. Your product would be useful to anyone who travels in an automobile, especially in areas where there are many lakes and canals, such as Florida.”
~ Bernie Payson

“Please make a news statement about your product today. Yesterday, in Florida, a woman in a BMW ended up in water, called 911, the news last night aired her call. She was sinking in the water and asking the 911 operators what could she do to get out of the car. The operator kept telling her to be calm and where are you? Had this woman had a LifeHammer or similar tool, she most likely would have survived. She ended up drowning.”

~ Anonymous

Apparently, the best they could come up with were a person that likes it, but has not purchased it; a person that likes it, bought it, but has not used it; and some nutjob that speculates that a poor drowning victim “most likely would have survived” if she had a LifeHammer. Not a single “LifeHammer saved me and my family from drowning!” or “I killed a carjacking asshole, thanks LifeHammer!”

Still, I’m happy to have it, but will hopefully never have to use it…especially since it’s sitting on the bookshelf in my house.

casualken